Friday, November 25, 2016

Mind work

I've lately been experiencing an extreme version of mind control.

I've become aware that people are in my mind and trying to control me and my actions.

I'm sure that it is so, and good just to know it becomes happier for me to release them by moving my head from side to side. I'm good now that I'm aware.

It's a breakthrough.

Not many people are aware of this. I'm good to be able to express it on an open place.

I'm going to be a lot free we and happier how did I not notice.

I'm finally free!

Good to share it, if you are not in pease than you should look at your mind.

Blessings on the good path to freedom.
Breeze

Intuitive healing by Bree-Native HAZELWOOD Tea

Yesterday whilst meditating the word 'hazelwood' came to me! Despite  the initial difficulty researching to track it down, one followed, ' I need it' and ' search for it,'

So I found it wasn't a herb, it wasn't a bush flower essence or homeopathy, in fact it was a native plant, so I adventured to a number of nurseries in coopers creek and finally found it at burringbar nursery under the botanical name of 'symplocas twaitsii'

I made tea from one of the green leaves and have drunk five cups of tea from the one leaf, today.

I had no data on what it would do, the nursery didn't know people made tea for therapy from it.

My initial intuitive understanding was that it was for clarity, sensitivity and intuition. It's not for intuition.

Everything went vivid. I felt embodied intimate with everything, balanced and sensitive to my feelings and reactions to everything, it altered my consciousness.

It releases the heart, emotional relief, it great for heart problems like intimacy in relationships and if you have trouble sleeping it's a great relaxant. It's great for hormones and balancing endocrine system.  (This is based on my own knowledge and intuition. )

I need this aid at the moment as I'm facing many mystical experiences and I'm finding it more difficult than anything to balance and stay balanced. 

I'm not recommending it to everyone, it might suit someone hypersensitive.

Hope this serves you well! 
Blessings and great love-
Breeze

Sunday, October 9, 2016

Spiritual practice for feelers... Workshop notes


Spiritual practice for feelers.

An enlightened perspective on feeling, into the heart, Letting go of heart in the end into the being.

If you like feeling than this is for you. If you want to open yourself to feeling than this is for you. If you don't want to feel, than please don't read on...

It is common not to like feeling hence addictions, the manic run that society is on, to do!  As long as you are doing something. Yoga brings us back to our ability and joy in being, through a little doing to begin with, but afterwards you'll find your capacity to float and enjoy the simplicity of life, 

I would like express that the feelings that you feel are only important to your heart, it is not valuable to anyone else. It is not anyone in the world in the world it is you. If you want to experience life's beauty than you really need to connect with yourself. 

Our feelings connect us to us. It helps you to be able to connect with momentary knowledge. And truth without the dust of the mind. 

The more you feel the more you know reality. It helps you to be connected to yourself and everyone in the area. It helps to home you. In the moment.  In the moment is very meaningful. 

No more mind!

Empty the mind! Work with your breath and the movement. 

Hope you are feeling ok, it is a difficult world and I know through the experience of enlightenment that it is not easy. The mind plays a lot of games, and not just your mind, but the mind of everyone around you, the energy fields are a continuous flow of energy, and it can take form of many dark and difficult places, sometimes it allows pockets of peace too but generally slot of the time the circumstances are unfavourable.  

I feel a lot of the time that I am the only one who is here, it feels like no one else is experiencing life. It is like you are all in your minds. I'm feeling to go into this topic and consider running workshops on it because I know how hard it is to be supported into simplicity. 


Love is not everywhere. In the end, you live in love. If you keep practicing it will fill your heart and mind. You will live in love. You will be happy. It will take you to a new level. 

I think that I want to support people to live a real and authentic life.

Hope you find what really makes you sing... In a deep and meaningful way. 

Spiritual practice for feelers


Spiritual practice for feelers.

An enlightened perspective on feeling, into the heart, Letting go of heart in the end into the being.

If you like feeling than this is for you. If you want to open yourself to feeling than this is for you. If you don't want to feel, than please don't read on...

It is common not to like feeling hence addictions, the manic run that society is on, to do!  As long as you are doing something. Yoga brings us back to our ability and joy in being, through a little doing to begin with, but afterwards you'll find your capacity to float and enjoy the simplicity of life, 

I would like express that the feelings that you feel are only important to your heart, it is not valuable to anyone else. It is not anyone in the world in the world it is you. If you want to experience life's beauty than you really need to connect with yourself. 

Our feelings connect us to us. It helps you to be able to connect with momentary knowledge. And truth without the dust of the mind. 

The more you feel the more you know reality. It helps you to be connected to yourself and everyone in the area. It helps to home you. In the moment.  In the moment is very meaningful. 

No more mind!

Empty the mind! Work with your breath and the movement. 

Hope you are feeling ok, it is a difficult world and I know through the experience of enlightenment that it is not easy. The mind plays a lot of games, and not just your mind, but the mind of everyone around you, the energy fields are a continuous flow of energy, and it can take form of many dark and difficult places, sometimes it allows pockets of peace too but generally slot of the time the circumstances are unfavourable.  

I feel a lot of the time that I am the only one who is here, it feels like no one else is experiencing life. It is like you are all in your minds. I'm feeling to go into this topic and consider running workshops on it because I know how hard it is to be supported into simplicity. 


Love is not everywhere. In the end, you live in love. If you keep practicing it will fill your heart and mind. You will live in love. You will be happy. It will take you to a new level. 

I think that I want to support people to live a real and authentic life.

Hope you find what really makes you sing... In a deep and meaningful way. 

Monday, October 3, 2016

Yoga Practice Notes: Moving into the feminine...October 2016

Yoga

If you are female, you really need to come into the feminine body with your yoga. 
It is something I'm working on to be able to do my yoga without moving into a male awareness.  That is too evolved, which i am, but im trying to get that as a secondary element to my feminine energy.  That is feeling, emotional and loving. 

Ive learnt that yoga can take you into the mind, it can hide away your feelings deep within instead of showing you how you feel so you can make the right decisions for yourself, momentarily knowing which way you need to move. This for me is path now, moving momentarily with my experience, sometimes going with how im feeling, other times, pushing myself and messing myself up on purpose, so that I can grow, open my heart and progress in being more loving in the long term.

It is easy to do a home practice which is better for your being, not only offering benefits of moving with awareness with your own body, but also being protected from the elements, the minds of others, the energy, have your own space at home for practice with a set of props, setting up your own space which has your own calming, loving energy will help you to get motivated and also enjoy your practice.

For the sake of maintaining my female energy, I'm particularly avoiding standing poses and anything rigorous, strenuous. Doing standing poses once a month. That is a focus on inversions and restorative poses with some forward bend, back bend and twists incorporated for full body experience. This is based on an Iyengar practice.


My practice at moment to begin the experience of staying female....It goes like this...


1.Supta baddha konasana x 5-10 minutes


2.With swastikonasana x 5-10 minutes


3.Ado mukha virasana x 5-10 minutes, twist variation is possible


4.Uttanasana hanging, or head to prop.


5.Head stand x long as possible, aim for 7 minutes or at least til you feel a change/ shift.


6. Supta virasana x 5-10 mins, can variate with twist version


7. Setu bandha w block below hips


8. Setu bandha sarvangasana x 5-10mins


9. Shoulder stand - 10 mins, halasana, kanapidasana, followed by rest 


10. Swastikonasana to rest forehead to chair 


11. Supta padangustasana 1.2&3


12. Forward bends, upavista konasana 


13. Baddhakonasana at wall on bolster. 


14. Twists , bharadjvasana


15. Savasana


16. Sit feel rest


17. Dance and/ or kundalini shake


18. Enjoy the effects


I am going to see how this goes, working with a softness and ease, hopefully to maintain feminine essence as most important thing to focus upon.  Will blog when i have something to talk about...see whether its working or still too much is possible..  Even doing one or two poses when needed during the day to bring back into body might be good, staying without being too active.

Friday, September 30, 2016

The evolving definition of spiritual enlightenment - by enlightened mystic and yogi, Bree Harris


Enlightenment is a state of being where you are free of the mind. The mind being thoughts. You are awareness. 


You become aware, simply aware and innocent because you no longer are lost in thought forms, you see clearly, and beyond the mind, and ordinary mind states. 

You become a feeler, a knower, and a lover, your mind is lovely and you hold the capacity 'to love' as well as 'to know,' you need to maintain time alone, away from others mind games and come into feeling more and more so that you can love with your heart and mind. 

You become pure to different degrees along your path depending on the person. 

In the early stages of enlightenment you go throw a period of honeymoon where you are in celebration of that freedom, it goes for varying lengths of time depending on the person.  My honeymoon went about 3 years.  i was so happy.  And the shit was yet to hit the fan in terms of how I understood this new state or space to be, in the world. 


I feel it's when you become aware that you are not the body, and get thrown into seeing you are not the mind, but you are the witness. You have realised the self, is not this, not that.


In fact, the moment you become enlightened you cease to exist as a separate entity. You are nothingness, gone into eternity, but paradoxically going to become 'more here' than ever. Due to become more settled in feeling states, states of intuitive knowing about things in the immediate and distant environments and minds of people. Established in self. It has taken me nine and a half years to become established in self, and come to a state of love.  Mainly because i'm sensitive, and very aware of the world and the universes.


In the early stages of enlightenment, the newly enlightened being can attempt to make it known that something has happened to them, to make a public statement or series of public statements. They often are shunned but that's good bc it means that the enlightened one is protected. 


In some cases it isobviously difficult to know whether the statement is true, whether the person is enlightened or not.  Knowing how it is, i would say you can percieve it through the eyes, they become clearer, less mind fog in the eyes, more pure looking.   Personally, I just knew I was enlightened, although the changes happened to me more over time as the realisations became more cemented, and as i grew and matured in my wisdom over the decade.

It is rare someone else accepts my reality of reaching enlightenment as their truth, although I see deeply that they actually 'know' it, they often deny that knowledge and refuse to accept my enlightenment purely based on their ego, more below...


---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Enlightenment in society, the impacts of the concept of enlightenment on the mind and ego of the un enlightened.

The people I meet and know are generally ignorant about the 'concept' of enlightenment, they think it's out of reach, and it's hard to grasp it unless it's your experience and it is rare the enlightened person goes into depth about what it means to be enlightened. I find discussions of enlightenment, affects the ego of the unenlightened, it leads them to convince themselves it's about believing to be better than, that unenlightened is less than, it's an awful mess. I might be female, which makes me different to being male, different not better or worse, it's the same with enlightenment, you are either enlightened or unenlightened. Different!  Where the better and worse comes into it, it is clearly the ego making such a mess.


I feel totally unseen and disrespected when people refuse to acknowledge a complete shift in my total being, I'm not the same person I was, even my parents refuse to notice the effect that all this yoga and meditation has had on me and my views of the world.  Very very frustrating.  They dont even seem to ask me why i do meditation, why i like it.  I think they are totally hopeless.  The experience is strange, why they are so terribly ignorant is beyond me.  I know there is a deeper reason for it, and i know that things shift when we do, I am told by my spirit guides not to expect a change here. Its protecting me.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Taking the world into an age of enlightenment for all.

I also perceived that people were egotistic, always trying to get me to take the world to a spiritual enlightenment phase, where everyone would get the opportunity to evolve. This happened for certain periods and I've been drugged now to stop me being vulnerable to the minds and manipulation of the ordinary only because they want to go to heaven. I not responsible for the enlightenment of everyone else. I not responsible for your minds. I have to experience your minds when I'm near you, which is why I prefer to stay alone. 


Sunday, September 11, 2016

Mind

I learnt today that I go in and out, from others minds overtaking mine, to my mind being in itself, loving,... 

From going to wooyung beach in a no mind space for over an hour I became more sensitive to the badness around me and when I was in or out of that badness... Be it jealousy, male mind control, female mind control....all states from not enough love.

 I found when I maintained my own mind for a period and cultivated love energy the women were attacking me, I had to go home, where exhausted I retreated in my bedroom.

A nothing day of being in the world.

The women want to manipulate me to get them love. I can't do it and I wouldn't do it. Go to India! Go to Osho! I'm not yours. I feel like they are trying to overtake me. I tell them to hope and fuck off.

Not a hope in the world. 

More than you

Please go away

The men try to control me with their minds, dominate, so that they have love. I tell them to fuck off. 





Mans mind affects the female in the relationship...

A women in a relationship with a man who is in the mind, will feel inherently bad from it. For he is not wanting her to feel how she feels. He doesn't want her to be. This will leave her feeling no good, not worthy. 

I spent a day with a man in the mind recently, the end, never again. I learnt my lesson, I felt bad after it. In the end I will find someone pure and in the heart. Love always wins.  In the end. 

Friday, September 9, 2016

What I'm experiencing...

At the moment, I am facing ongoing onslaught of people trying to get in my headspace and steal or fuck with my love.  I'm not happy about it but I am aware that it will stop soon.   Another windy day, the wind signifying evil abounding.

I feel like i can no longer take part in group settings.  I was about to start an 8 day spring yoga intensive until I remembered that all this year Ive been moving away from groups, no longer attending the osho meditations on sunday mornings or the osho community dinner, no healings, no kirtan, no cooking classes, no yoga classes, no counselling course in brisbane,....nope, nothing, Not able to sit next to people while they take advantage of my niceness and fuck with my mind.

Ive become very aware of my feelings especially this last few weeks. and now i can feel what ive been shown, I can now feel.... The jealousy ive been shown for a year, i can now feel; the men and the heavy minds overpowering and stopping me from feeling, i can now feel; the people stealing love, i can now feel, and see.... alot more sensitive and aware.  So all the time alone is starting to show.

Im enjoying being and being alone, alot more satsified with the simplicity.  Im enjoying my space. feeling is a beautiful experience ... i feel like im ready to move.  ive done my work here...ive moved from heart to mind.

I'm ready.

I'm hoping that ill be readier to move in march and will see how i feel in the middle of the month, i just hope ill have my man by then... :D




Tuesday, September 6, 2016

I breathe, I am love

I breathe in
I take in the world-
-

I breathe out
I let go of it all-
-

I search for answers
In society, in books, in knowledge
-

I find my answers
in myself, in my heart mind and being.
-

I think I am

I create my world with actions, stemming from my thoughts or ideas (masterfully aligned with my heart)
-

I search outside
Or I turn within.

-
I feel i am
I am a being beyond the mind
-

The universe creates powerfully from the desires of my heart
I choose to live laugh and love
-

I connect with you
I connect with me
-

So full of intelligence
Some say think before you speak
-

I feel before I act..
I feel love and act
-

I am attracted to love
And sometimes a feeling of peace engulfs me
-

I breathe in our silences
I act from my heart

-

A lil book I'm writing and illustrating...needs to be untangled...

hold the world in my heart- as I walk in love.
A lil book for all beings great and small

CONNECTION
My heart is an energetic centre?
It magnetises things to me?
It sends out messages to the world?
It receives messages from the world?
I am connected?
--------------
HEART MIND and MANIFESTING a life of LOVE
I connect to people and my dreams through my heart?
Is it true?
When I really FEEL, my aligned thoughts MANIFEST, in time, in flow.
Are the feelings of my heart and the ideas of my mind aligned?
My heart tells me when my mind is off kilter?
Do I manifest my hearts desires, or is it my minds desires?
--------------------
MYSTICISM
Do I sometimes surrender to something greater than me?
Sometimes, things just flow, they are in harmony?
Do I find that words come from nowhere, from a deeper place inside of me, or a place beyond me?
------------------
SILENCE
There is an emptiness inside my heart?
There is a fullness inside my heart?
My heart has it's own empty and full silence?
I can hear others silence.
They can hear me, I can hear them.
Silence heals my heart?
My heart has capacity for its own love inside.
-----------------------
LOVE
I feel love in my heart?
(Sometimes suffering leads to a loving compassionate heart)
My heart reflects or mirrors love?
My heart feels jealousy? It's mine?
My heart feels and processes emotions like anger, hatred and fear..
My enlightened heart consciously chooses it emotions and is impacted less and less by outside?
-------------------------
WHIMSY
In here,  I can feel all the stars and universes in my heart?
The trees, the birds, the oceans belong here, in my heart?
--------------------------------
SENSES
I feel you in my heart?
I hear you in my heart?
---------------------------------
Is it true?
---------------------------------
HEART vS MIND
I uplift and open my heart and feel oneness and connection
I move closer, listen or speak (fulfill needs)
When things get hard or confusing, painful or scary I can move away from my heart, and close it?"
But that is the scary dark world of head,- metropolis, parliaments and wars.
 (Robots, mechanical, schizophrenic mind)
Here I can experience illness like anxiety depression.
--------------------------------------
MEDITATION
When things get like this I can move inside and rest in my heart.?
The answers are in my heart?
Is it true?

UNITY
I feel My heart and yours?
I feel us in my heart.?
I hear you in my heart.?
I feel you in my heart.?

Our heart is sacred.
------------------------------------
QUALITIES OF THE HEART
It is strong.?
It will wait for the right time.?
It is sensitive?
It is intelligent..?

NEEDS
Careful, know me, care for me.
-------------------------------------
ADVENTURES of THE Heart (whimsy)
Sometimes the heart is very far ahead of my mind and tells me secrets when I'm listening?
It takes me on adventures through hunches and pulls...Pushes, tears and laughter.
--------------------------------------
TRUST AND GUiDANcE
I trust myself, and I care for myself and my needs through my heart?
I allow myself to be guided by my heart?
-----------------------------------------
Is it true?
My mind is a tool so my heart can actualise its dreams? And live a life of love?
-----------------------------------------
EMOTIONS
Ouch, I feel sad, I allow tears to wash away the pain and start afresh, great?
Where it feels love, it is right. Go that way? My path?
When I feel happy and loved I find some space to go deeply inside.
With clarity I allow my heart to guide my mind?
--------------------------------------------
Is it true?
-----------------------------------------
MIND and EXPLORING EMOTIONS
My mind wants to play with ideas?
Real and great ideas come through me?
Inspiration? Madness? Creativity.
My mind creates habits which fill my being with density and heaviness? Emotional beings?
I allow this emotion to pass through.?
sometimes I play it out in a safe place?
--------------------------------
I feel ashamed to be angry, I look ugly? Double shot, watch, just let it pass... .
I am beautiful? So free, so innocent
My being is free?
----------------------
KNOW THYSELF
I want to honor my feelings and be my full self?
A silently watching peaceful self?

ATTITUDE
Is it difficult? Or beautiful?
----------------------------------
EXPERIENCING
I feel the world through my heart?
I commune with you?
I meditate to know my heart?
I share my life and love with the all. ..?
I love....?  See it.

From August... published to my facebook page...

When I came here to Samaya Ashram Australia ashram in 2012 my eyes were dry, nothing could break me to tears... It took a lot of beating to bring me into my heart after fear, shock and awakening took me on a reckless path of being lost in the mind,... but now things like the vastness that is us, the nothingness of my being and of silence and music touch me and deeply... 

That which moves me. The love of our master, Osho brings me to tears every time I watch a discourse and feel his love with me and my deep deep gratitude for his gifts of love. Lost love hurts also, lost love brings me to tears, be it haircuts or boyfriends. Nobody being there for me hurts, nobody in the world. But existence, the greater love, is there.I have existence. In the palm of my hand. Or in my empty heart. I love. And for that I am grateful, and embroiled, for within this virtue lies much suffering. 

Not because it hurts to love, or that love leads to hurt but because most hearts can't bare to feel that they love less. And feel that they too Deserve the blessings of MY great path. They don't want to see me happy, and that hurts me daily, faced with evil people, wanting to covet my love for their own, so that they can be happiest.

 It's not more painful than knowing that your being disintegrated into nothingness ten years back and now in fact you're gone and everything is nothingness. The battles of the enlightened. It is my enlightenment day coming up. The 15th September, 2016 marks ten years. Happy enlightenment day to me. Endless love only if you feel it. Thinking Is over rated, and only a heart which feels and knows can bring you home. Next time you pretend to be happy look inside and see whether it is being in the mind or whether it is coming from the depths of your heart.

Omg... I see people

I went to bruns and really just was being, enjoying the nature sounds smells feelings... Enjoying little pockets of no mind releasing my body from stresses... It was beautiful and I really feel I'm mastering the art of being. Without needing to do. 

I sometimes feel like it looks like I'm waiting for something to happen. I think people can't actually grasp that I'm simply being in the environment and that I'm not waiting.
I could have stayed for another hour or so but left prematurely showing me I still have to let go a little further and give up having how I'm perceived as something influencing my movements.

On the way home I faced a lot of jealousy, when I'm at my beauty and have really sunk into my being I see a lot of jealousy. I also faced manipulation. A couple tried to get love off me I gave them none and felt angry and saddened by their ogling in fact impacting on my state and interfering in my day. How dare they try to get love off me. I give a lot, I'm not going to be taken from, manipulated and controlled by anyone. I gave them dirty looks, no love, cried on my way home, the winds started bc I felt a lot of evil, I felt better when I felt like I was smart to know what they were up to, before they had acted I knew it was no good and I acted promptly to let them know they were bad. 

I feel affected by their badness. I hate that they can go out of their way to hurt me and make me hate them. I hope they think that they are bad. Bc they are. 


Monday, September 5, 2016

How much can I bare?

How much can i bare?

Nobody but me, here, understands what I experience in everyday life.  It is terrible the state of society and the mind of mankind. 

Everybody is in their minds. I must be very rare to be in my heart and mostly in my being. 

Mostly people are in their thoughts, and that limits them to being not very here. I can see the clouds and feel the kind of pain and anguish they face on a momentary basis. I know you can be healed and free and absolutely not free from this.

I walk my path seeing control mechanisms of both men and women, the men trying to dominate the women and sometimes society, treating their own children and families as mechanisms to reach somewhere they're not and they'll never get.  They energetically persuade people to do as they wish through the power of their unconscious mind. I see it all the time, and feel the effects of people trying to manipulate my being to get whatever they want. But I'm blessed to know what's happening and when, where most people aren't quite so savvy.

My intuition guides me momentarily and I'm shown how I need to behave by my strong and clear feelings and internal movements.
I'm always avoiding people who want to mess with my soul and heart and trying to stay near the pure hearty ones. 

Today I hoped to be, be, like just breathe in and out and feel, but I was overtaken by many people, trying to get their way and dominating my being. I cried and in the moment I did the winds came, the winds are always there showing me when evil is expressing itself.

I felt so at a loss, saddened and over it. I'm not here for you stupid people. I not going to be in your head space. I don't like your head and keep it away from me. Today I feel nauteous and don't want people connecting me to their minds, I want to stay in my peaceful bedroom and be. Still and beautiful. 

More than this is how I feel. I am more than this. Most . I feel. Most people do t understand what's going on. I am. I am here, I am alive. It's not perfect but I'm free and happy in my heart. Most people aren't. I am here. I am here. I am here. 

Mantra, for me is this. I am here. I am here. I am here. 

Most people are in their fucked up minds trying to manipulate everything around them to get what they want! It's not right!

I'm so pissed off with all of society and everyone knows I hate it here. I'm kind. But no one else sees this. I'm beautiful, pure, but no one sees this. I am here. It's no use everybody is too concerned with their personal agenda. 

Trying to be felt/ heard /respected/ honoured in this world is impossible. It is rare I feel loved. I got to go to India to do that. 

I mean I have had enough of western mind. I am so sick to death of it I might cry for eternity.  My soul is hurting so hard. It is not happy. My heart is happy. My soul unhappy. Most people don't get it. I feel like expressing what's happening for me as enlightenment, is not meant to be easy. It is excruciatingly painful and difficult. It has never been easy. I'm trapped in a world - you don't know what it is! It is not what you think! It is not how you think! 

Get out of your mind. Meditate. Feel. Come closer to the truth. I hope you enjoy the process and the beauty of things like the sound of silence, the glance of a pure friend, the love of good people, it is not actually how you perceive... 
Hope you see something of a different vision. I'm sure that you hope to understand, it might take you sometime but if you really want to 'know', and maybe even 'love' someday than your time on earth has not been lost in the rat race. 
Much love 



Saturday, May 7, 2016

Feeling

the most important thing is to feel

Thursday, May 5, 2016

Connection to atma buddhis other than myself...

A few days ago it was a special day for Ramana so I watched a puja from aranachula online, feeling deeply connected to it. I felt tears of gratitude well up as they recited ramanas name in different forms... The following day I felt and was thinking if Ramana when his energy came into mine and I felt love in my heart, once again an immense feeling of gratitude swept over me followed by a sense of losing my ego, becoming more humble, being divinely cared for.

Sunday, April 17, 2016

Breaking up...

This latest experience of breaking up with a lover has been a deeply transforming experience.

There have been a number of steps in the process and it is only four months later that my being has decided to separate energetically. The pain I'm feeling in my body is immense. Like a clanging pain. I have energetically had to ask him to leave me, it is time to move on. I hope it goes well.

Initially I witnessed his mind leave my mind, then an acknowledgement that he stole my heart and that I didn't give it to him. I experienced a few releases of emotions after reiki, massage, releases of the heart. I experienced my guides triggering me into deep release on a few occasions. It was a flowering, an expression of anger and sadness, followed by happiness.

I have become more sensitive during the breakup time, it's not specific to break ups but where I am in my self realisation, I'm becoming more myself. In that, I'm feeling more not just me but the energies around me.

I'm happier out of relationship, I've observed. The heaviness of another's emotions are a weight for me, and I find myself more content out of relationship.

Right now is my time. I'm enjoying being and non doing. Keeping away from lower energies and centering in my being.

I'm about to go for a Lomi Lomi w gifted healer so hopefully I'll be more embodied after. I got to go now.  Sharing in love.

Sunday, March 13, 2016

Lomi Lomi course at Stradbroke island...

So I decided to take myself away for a blissful holiday of action...
All in all it was beautiful !
Hope was there, a lot of love energy. And clearing of emotional stuff.
I felt good just good.
I got myself in a deep state, in transit on the way home, the mind went into turmoil amongst so many people, I felt crazed by the crowd. It helped me see where I was.
I needed to feel more.
I was blocked by the negative emotions of the people.
I was feeling hurt by them.

Monday, March 7, 2016

How can he...

God took my heart
How
I'm not sure
How
Just
Just took it from me
Just took it
Just took it
Anthony stole it
He took my heart from me
It just is true
How could he
Just
Just
Just
How could he take it
It's not real
Our love
It's fake
I don't really love
Just
Just
He took
He took my heart
It's true
It really only happened
It happened
It happened

Finding my feeling...

So my plan is to sit around in my new apartment for the next 3 months.

This will bring back my feeling, and love will enter my being on greater scale, I'll feel happier being able to be more present and conscious of happenings.

I hope to be able to love. Lots and lots of love.

3 months. A long time to practice non doing.
Well I've been non doing for 3 mths already. I have opened into feeling my body more. I can feel my own intimate feelings. It is much more fun than pretending to enjoy time w others.
On the weekend I'm doing a Lomi Lomi course... It will be healing. I will meet new people and enjoy a lot of massage. 

Monday, February 22, 2016

this moment

I woke up feeling happy and in my heart 

Sunday, February 21, 2016

Head, no thanks, heart, yes...

Most days i sit and try to feel, to stay in my heart and move into my being.

Today, I was in my heart and loving after a small stint in a cafe, giving people love.After sitting at home basking in the love, having a cry to release, I decided to take a break and have a look in a dress shop. Upon returning I felt terrible, hard full of bad feelings, I acknowledged I was in my mind. I'd been taken into my mind. I had a little bit of fun and right there, happy again,' back in the heart.

The atmosphere kept trying to take me back into my mind, with awareness i managed to stay down, in my heart.

Went for a walk again, this time to get an Ice cream, and noticed if my awareness was on myself I'd stay down, on others straight into the mind. but I'm just being made very aware by today's openness that everyone is in their minds, and trying to bring me out of my heart and into my mind.

I endeavour to stay in my heart. I'm very aware of the up down notion which can take place for a Buddha but I know that i belong where I'm happy, in my heart. It's safer, cosier, happier there.
I feel angry at all people for being in their heads and trying to pull me unconsciously into mine.