So somehow i found myself offline and off-writing, maybe even anti-writing for about 6 long intense months of spiritual development and psychic insight. I left samaya ashram in the bush @ byron bay hinterlands in november after 6 months of seeing my lifes path revealed. During this time i began to develop compassion for myself and my life path and also for others. In saying this, it is now i am aware that i watch when 'my heart steams and fires' and now that I gratefully begin to move towards prayer and communion... ' Now i know that when i move the wrong or right way, a flood can form... this path is not for the faint hearted. Gather your courage because forwards we need to go.
Chrisitian mysticism presented me with the practical insight into how the goodness and badness of The Christian doctrine deeply affected our psyche. With power comes responsibility, and responsibility for us fragile spoilt and deeply hurt and moved ones comes either love or fear, you get to choose....so christianity and religious dogmatism imprisoned us in a static and dead book world of guilt, blame and shame, harmed our minds and hearts for eternity, and to free us from this, especially us inferior yogis, is a long and challenging process, that sometimes more than one person can face, for one person is in fact connected to the sacred heart and energy system and consciousness of the all. [dont believe me- oh, thats power]
So during this time i began to differentiate between 'my own' heart and 'my own' mind, my own' soul' and 'my own' 'spirit, and all the time realising that the outside influences created the being i am today, and the unique path i still feel i have chosen parts of, was created by forces much much bigger than thyself...this is one of the most important teachings to date... especially for this little caged bird, who has spent years wanting to express her full self, and burns each time she passees up the opportunity to sing to the world...the journeys message. sing. dont miss. be.
I found that my mind was being astrally sweeped by the onsite seers @ samaya ashram, i was patiently waiting, trying to fulfill the desires of my soul to keep up, to let go of the mad concoction of the worlds mind. THis lifes past was put into the light, with projections and illusions all demonstrated before my eyes. Dreams i had were seen, with the blockage carefully portrayed, blockages to dreams, parental influence, friends, habits and addictions of mine, as taking the place in time of things i really wanted.
Osho said in one of his books
that ' a buddha without compassion can be a great calamity for the world.'